


Light in the darkness

by monablack3



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: F/F, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:47:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25147939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monablack3/pseuds/monablack3
Summary: Collection of one shots exploring Joel and Henry's relationship if him and Sam didn't die horribly in the middle of the game
Relationships: Ellie & Joel (The Last of Us), Ellie & Sam, Henry & Sam (The Last of Us), Joel & Tommy (The Last of Us), Joel/Henry
Comments: 16
Kudos: 26





	1. One week

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very new to this, plus English is not my first language so I apologize if this sucks.  
> Thanks to Michelle and the rest of the Octopunk fam for inspiring this and for giving me this ship. Enjoy!

Anyone who's ever had the displeasure of meeting him would say that Joel has a hard time relaxing.  
"It's not being uptight, it's being careful" he'd said once in response to one of Ellie's playful remarks about the man's personality; being friendly is not how he survived for 20 whole years in this shithole of a world after all.

  
Well, all of that seemed to go out the window the first week Henry and Sam joined them.

  
Not that it was his choice whatsoever, it was Ellie who told them their name after Sam had pointed a gun at their faces, careless as always; it wasn't his fault that the kids hit it off immediatly and made each other smile like they never had done since they were born; it wasn't his fault that Henry was as much a good fighter as he was good company to have around. And, in a thought that Joel decided to keep for himself, also one good looker.  
And damn him, maybe that's exactly what he needed, at least for now. Maybe he needed one night of sleeping with both eyes closed or waking up to someone making breakfast for him or seeing Ellie laughing so hard that her eyes completely disappear or having someone taking care of him after a rough fight like Henry had done or feeling the touch of another human being who is not trying to kill you for a can of peaches. Maybe he just needed to feel like he was _living_ instead of just surviving.

  
.-.

  
The pot of whatever delicious soup Henry was cooking that evening sizzled in the silence, only interrupted by Sam and Ellie's excited voices, one of Ellie's comic books in their hands. Joel sat beside Henry, looking at them with the shadow of a smile on his face; when Henry turned his head to look at him, the smile didn't falter.

"I swear those two could talk an infected to death". Henry snorted, Joel's smile got a little wider.

"They had to hear us talk about motorcycles and hunting for a whole week, they deserve a little break from us old men".

"Speak for yourself". Henry gave him a dirty look. Still smiling, Joel stole the spoon from him and tasted the soup.

"God what I'd give to have a steak"

"I take it the service is not of your taste, good Sir" Henry said in a fake offended tone. Joel took the bait.

"Absolutely not. You could do with a more varied selection of dishes and less" he gestured around the dirty room. Henry raised his eyebrows, keeping the acts going.

"I apologize for the inconvinience, Sir. I'll have the lobster and caviar sent to your room"

"No champagne?"

"Of course"

"And a masseur"

"I'll see what I can do"

"You don't even have a masseur and you dare ask me if the service is of my taste?"

"I could work extra and give you a free massage as an apology". Joel's voice got caught in his throat for a second, dropping the act. He stared at Henry. Henry stared back.

"That...would be satisfying enough, thank you" he finally was able to utter. Silence dropped on the room. When they both woke up from their trance state, they realized that Ellie and Sam were looking at them with a strange expression on their faces. 

"So uhm...is dinner ready?" Ellie asked. Why was she smiling? And why did Sam look like he was about to throw up at any moment? 

"Uhm yes" Joel's voice cracked as he got up to grab plates for everyone. He was too busy hiding his suddenly blushed face to catch Henry's quick shy smile in his direction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Feedback is very much appreciated <3


	2. Three weeks

If Henry hadn't been witness to Joel's badassery, he would have thought him to be the biggest bullshitter he's ever met.

Twenty years almost completely on his own, killing thousands of people, surviving all types of infected (including a monstrosity of fungi called Bloater him and his paranoid friend Bill took down not long before meeting him), plus hundreds of spore infected rooms... Forgive a man for being doubtful. But in the small timespan they've spent travelling together, Henry saw that Joel was not the type to joke around a lot, except maybe during the down times between a fight and the other. Nothing too surprising, the world they live is not fueled by kindness, but that made the small moments a smile crossed the old man's face all the more special. 

Ellie was his polar opposite: a smile constantly plastered on her face, quick witted, always a joke ready on her mind for every situation, a 'do first, think later' kinda gal; not the best for surviving in an apocalypse, but necessary nonetheless. And Sam loved to be around her, and she seemed to reciprocate; Henry doesn't even remember the last time he saw his little brother smile like that, memories of his past life with their parents flashing in his mind, bittersweet taste in his mouth. From the first time he saw his little bro in his mom's arms thinking "And what the hell am I supposed to do with this?" to dedicating his whole life to protect him, things sure have changed.

.-.

"I've never been camping before"

"Well, sleeping unprotected in a place that could be full to the brim with infected surely doesn't sound appealing".

"Smartass". Joel playfully punched Henry's shoulder. The kids were already fast asleep, having spent the whole day clearing out their surrounding area from infected and going hunting for dinner. It felt good to shoot at something non humanoid for once, no matter how fucked up that sounds. And having some meat after weeks of canned soup didn't sound that bad.

So now bellies full, they sit under the trees, looking up at the sky. Joel looked calm, almost at peace. Almost.

"Keep talking about you and your brother's time camping alone".

Joel glanced in his direction, a little smile in his face probably caused by good memories, then readjusted to get more comfortable.

"Was hot as balls, mosquitos formed a sorta cloud right outside our tent. Tommy was horrible at shooting, so we ended up eating some instant noodles our dad gave us "just in case"" he quoted with his fingers, "he knew that Tommy was not good at hunting but still insisted on doing it by himself so". He chuckled. Henry felt captured by the sound. 

"Then at night time, the biggest rainstorm of the whole season dropped on our heads, it looked like a fuckin' tornado was about to hit us" 

"Oh my God" it was now Henry's turn to laugh. 

"It was a disaster, yeah. But it taught us some valuable lessons. Like, check the weather before doing anything outside" he started laughing too.

When they finally calmed down, a comfortable silence fell between them. Henry gave a quick glance at the kids, hoping for them to have a dreamless, good night of sleep.

"What about you? You never done stuff with your brother for fun?" Joel's voice startled him a little. He swallowed.

"Not really. Maybe the occasional soccer game during down times, but nothing more. He was very young so my parents took care of him mainly. Then they died, and it's been just surviving since then".

"Mh...that must have been scary as all hell for you"

"Oh, it was" he sighed, still looking at Sam. A hand found its place on his shoulder. He turned towards Joel. Joel stared at Henry. Henry stared back. The hand gave a little squeeze, then slowly retreated. 

He didn't know when he fell asleep, but he did so with the feeling of Joel's hand still imprinted in his mind. And if only he had turned around at the right time, he would have seen Joel guarding over him until sleep took over him too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the nice comments in the first chapter <3 I hope you liked this one too!


	3. Two months

Henry's parents were named Joshua and Malinda. Henry's favorite color is red. Henry has a birthmark on his left shoulder. Henry shot his first infected when he was 8. Henry knows how to play guitar. 

Henry.

Henry.

_Henry._

For the first time in two decades of war and violence and survival being the only things occupying Joel's mind, a new host has made himself comfortable inside his nightmare clouded brain; a host with brown eyes that could melt you on the spot with either kindness or fury, a smile that would put the Sun to shame and a voice smoother than butter left in the heat for two hours straight. He felt like a teenager all over again. 

The only other person he had allowed in his mind being Sarah. And maybe now, Ellie. 

He likes how smart Henry is, how he's so quick at tracking down animals to hunt just by looking at the leaves disturbed by their passing, how he is able to singlehandedly shoot down a whole pack of infected while being held in a chokehold by a bandit, how he disciplines his brother with a stern but never aggressive voice. 

At first he just pat himself on the back as to say "Good job Joel, you chose to not kill the right guy", but as time passed and looks and touches started to linger for a longer period of time, he decided to stop lying to himself to maintain some sort of dignity.

.-.

His own words echoing in his mind, memories repeating like a broken record. He has killed, tortured, betrayed; he has never felt this amount of guilt and regret for his actions as he does now, after what he said to Ellie. He's right, she is not his daughter, but maybe she didn't need to be reminded of it. Maybe the orphan girl turned weapon against the virus that tore the world to shit didn't need to be reminded that she is just a package to be delivered. Maybe.

"What are you gonna do now?" Henry's voice finally broke him free from his thoughts. 

"Leave her to Tommy and go on my merry way"

Henry looked at him with an eyebrow raised.

"You know, you don't sound that confident about it", and Joel finally turned to look at him.

"I know"

Henry gave him a weak smile, then took the chair in front of him. They sat in silence.

"I was thinking of going with your brother to Jackson" Joel didn't look surprised by that.

"What about the Fireflies?" 

Henry looked at his hands, thinking. 

"When you went with your brother to look for Ellie, his wife and I talked a little. She told me about the people who live in Jackson, how some of them are ex Fireflies, including her husband" he raised his eyes and looked at Joel "and you"

Joel rubbed his eyes, sighing. 

"Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner-"

"I don't want an apology, Joel. You had your reasons for not telling me, clearly, and I won't hold it against you" Joel seemed to perk up a little at that.

"I just...I don't want to keep feeding on this sense of heroism and empty promises and some bullshit like that, not when I have a brother to take care of. Seeing him with Ellie these past few months...did something to me. I just want him to have the best life he can possibly have on this God forsaken planet, not one made of pure fear for his life"

Joel looked at him intently, thoughts spiraling in his brain. 

"I ain't gonna judge you for your choice if that's what's bothering you" 

"Pfft, like I care about what you think, grandpa" Joel finally relaxed. 

"I'm gonna miss you guys, you know that?" 

"Yeah. Me too" Joel stared at Henry. Henry stared back.


	4. Six months

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I'm not that proud of this one honestly, but thank you for reading anyway)

Joel has four scars adorning his face: a slash on his forehead, two star shapes on both his cheeks and a small one on the bridge of his nose. Joel's eyes are a rich brown, you can tell only when his face is not scrunched up into a permanent intimidating expression, like when he's too tired to keep up the rough exterior or when he's telling some stories from his past life or when he watches Ellie and Sam have fun. 

Or at least that's what Henry remembers of Joel.

Jackson is safe and calm enough to allow himself a lot of downtime, between one mission on patrol with Tommy and the other, and all he can think about is the old, angry looking man who has saved his life more times than he can count. He feels like if he's not thinking about him at least once per day, he's going to forget how he looks like. 

So he thinks about him at morning time, when he helps prepare breakfast for the good folks he's been living with for the past few months, he thinks about him when he's out hunting with Joel's brother, the memory of all the stories he told about him in his mind, he thinks about him in the evening, when he plays guitar and the kids play without a care in the world. And he thinks about him at night time, shamelessly, in his bed, dreaming of strong arms wrapped around him and deep, warm voice in his ears, relaxed smile for him and him only. 

He quietly prays for him to be back soon. He hasn't done so since his parents died, but it's what his heart is telling him.

.-.

And it's in early spring, the snow slowly starting to melt, when he stops praying. 

Tommy already talking Joel's ears off, Ellie following him. He turns around to look at him and their eyes lock. 

"You son of a bitch I was starting to think I would never see you again!" he runs and finally wraps his arms around the man, who returns the hug with the same intensity. 

"Thought you knew you're not gonna get rid of me that easily" Joel _smiles_.

"Come on, you gotta tell me everything-" 

"Oh hey! I was talking to him first!" Tommy put on a fake pout, looking back at Ellie. She smirked weakly.

"I will talk with everyone who wants to listen, after I get some goddamn food in my belly"

Smiling like kids seeing each other after summer break, they walk to the kitchen. 

.-. 

Henry and Tommy sit in silence, staring in disbelief at Joel.

"Holy shit" is all Henry is capable of saying. Tommy is silent.

"Listen, I'm not gonna judge you for it. Ya know I would have done the same if Sam were in Ellie's place"

"I know"

"Are we the only ones who know about this?" 

"The only ones left alive, yes" Henry nodded, looking at his feet. 

"Well, it shall remain like this. I'll take this to my grave, you can be sure of that brother" Joel nodded, looking at Henry, who gave him quick nod. 

"I'll go check if Maria needs any help" Tommy got up from his seat and walked out the room, closing the door behind him.

Henry sighed.

"Let's take a look at that wound, shall we?" 

"I doubt I need any help with it, the Fireflies took care of it properly when I was out" 

"Yeah well, sorry for not trusting people who were willing to sacrifice a child without her consent" Joel snorted, then started to unbutton his shirt. The scar ran from his stomach all the way beyond his navel, a nasty one. Henry looked at it, hissing, trying to not look at the man's naked chest for too long. 

"If a thirteen year old was able to keep me alive, then it means it was not that bad" Joel joked around, trying to make Henry smile. 

"You know, if you don't want anything to do with me after this, you don't have to feel guilty about it" Henry stopped in his tracks, confused.

"What? Dude I already said I was not gonna judge you for-"

"Not judging me doesn't mean that you agree with what I did"

"And not agreeing with your actions doesn't mean I want you dead" Henry felt like it was obvious.

"You deserve better friends" 

"I did not wait for you for months just to toss you out like trash at the first disagreement, Joel".

Henry stared at Joel. Joel stared back. 

"You...waited for me" 

"Course I did".

Joel stood up from his chair, slowly walking towards Henry. And just as slowly, hugged him tight. Henry wrapped his arms around him, letting Joel's head rest on his shoulder. Joel let go of him after a beat, and looked at him. 

"Thank you Henry". 

Joel rebuttoned his shirt, walking out the room, leaving a disheveled Henry on his own, thoughts spinning in his mind and heart racing in his chest, not knowing that Joel's was beating at the same tempo from where he was hiding behind the closed door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I cannot believe that this story already has 70 hits, thank you for your support ♥️ JENRY NATION RISE!!


	5. One year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit 100 hits?? And right after my birthday?? Y'all left me speechless, thank you so so much ♥️

Things are changing.

It's not a secret to anyone. But not everyone knows just how many things are, and how much. 

The various missions the people of Jackson organized around the area of the town almost made it an infected-free zone, less and less showing up on the hills and even less being able to reach the gates. This also means more animals will start roaming the woods again, making it easier to get food to feed the entire Jackson, which is slowly starting to grow; between more survivors being taken in by Maria and people being healthy and happy enough to start making babies again, more mouths to feed but also more skilled hunters, medics, architects. People are enough to have a home of their own, no longer having to fit in a single building. 

Joel's house is coming together nicely. It feels impossible to be able to have something nice and cozy to come back to after a long day of work, it really felt like coming back to older, happier times. Some paint and more finiture and it will be more than okay for him. Ellie also has her own room, already filled with comic books that Joel grabs on his journeys outside the walls of the town for both her and Sam. She has also picked up drawing, she's already quite good at it. Joel only knows 'cause he casually saw her one evening when she wasn't paying attention. He also saw what, or _who_ she was drawing, one of the other kids she made friends with since arriving to Jackson, but he decided to not think about it too much. If she'll ever want to tell him, then he will listen to her and nothing less. 

But despite this, he still feels like something is missing. 

.-.

The soft lights hanging from the ceiling of the common room cast long shadows of the partying people on its walls, the music coming from different kinds of instruments fueling their steps as they dance and sing and play. 

Joel has never been a party person. Not even meeting his future wife at one of the many college parties his brother forced him to attend changed his mind. He did like seeing people finally getting looser and loving life again. 

Wow, Jackson was really making him a sap. 

Also because he just can't seem to take his eyes off of one particular person who has been twirling around on the dance floor all night long, muscular legs still very defined under his jeans, smile from ear to ear. One person that has been haunting his sleep for months now. 

It's when the improvised band finishes yet another song when he finally wakes up from his dream like state and goes to the bar to get something to drink. He feels like he's gonna need it if he wants to get some semblance of sleep tonight. 

And of course the person of interest appears right beside him. 

"Hey man" 

"Evening, Henry"

That smile again. 

"How have your legs not fallen off already?" 

"Because _I_ don't spend all of my time on horse back or sitting down cleaning guns and playing guitar ya know" 

"Yeah you're also not 50" 

"Oh come on man, I've seen you take down dozens of people with a broken hand" Joel shrugs. 

"Why do you just turn off when it's time to use your energy to have fun?" 

"I just like to preserve my 'energy' for more useful things" Henry rolls his eyes "and besides, I doubt anyone would want to spend their free time with me, trust me".

Henry stares at him with a confused expression on his face, until the band starts playing again, a softer and slower song echoing around them. Henry looks at him, smirking. Joel gets it immediately. 

"Oh no no no, you're not gonna make me dance with you-" but is not even able to finish his sentence that Henry is dragging him on the dance floor. Joel could probably easily free himself from the man's grip, but he finds that he doesn't want to. 

Henry puts a hand on his hip and with the other grabs one of Joel's hands, and begins to rock both of them gently, following the beat of the song. Joel can feel himself burning already. 

They continue like this for a couple of minutes, until Joel slowly starts to get more and more comfortable in Henry's arms, and puts his free hand on the man's back, getting closer to him. 

The music drowned out by the sound of his heartbeat in his ears, the lights shining around Henry making him look like a fucking divine apparition, Joel forgets everything. For a little while, it's just them. 

"Y-You know I was thinking" he wets his lips, his throat dry "since you and Sam are still sleeping at Tommy's and I have a spare room...would you like to come live with me- erm us?"

Henry's smile gets even bigger, his eyes shining and Joel feels like if he died right here and now, he would die happy knowing that that was the last thing he saw. 

"I'd like that. And I'm sure Sam will love to be able to spend more time with Ellie". 

Joel stared at Henry. Henry stares back. They smile. 

Things are changing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cinematic parallels? Cinematic parallels.


	6. Summer

It's easily one of the hottest days Jackson has ever experienced. 

The medics have forced curfews on the town to avoid people collapsing from the heat, like it has been happening basically every day since the heat wave hit. Thankfully fresh, clean water is a perk of living in the mountains. And the genius that is Rose, the master chef of Jackson, somehow managed to salvage the ingredients to create actual _ice cream_ . Also the woods provide great coverage from the Sun, even when it's at its highest points of the day. 

Here is where Joel and Henry have been spending most of their days. Sam and Ellie have created their own groups of friends with the other kids and they have stopped hanging out with the elders, but this was expected to happen, and greatly encouraged by said elders. Maybe sometimes they do miss having those firecrackers around. But Henry has sincerely never been better in his entire life like he is now in Jackson. Sometimes at night time he doesn't want to go to sleep because he is afraid of waking up and finding out that it was all just a perfect dream, and he will find himself surrounded by runners, him and Sam alone. 

But then, when sleep eventually conquers his body, he wakes up in a soft bed, in a house that is not falling to pieces, with Sam sleeping soundly (to the point of snoring, but he denies it greatly) in his room, not having seen a runner in almost three weeks, a pantry full of food...and a hand on his shoulder. 

.-. 

It is way too hot to sleep. 

Henry lies on the bed watching Joel uselessly trying to make the old fan they found on a mission work. "That thing is more rust than metal" he'd said to the older men, who just shrugged and tied it to his horse. He can't blame him though, the heat has been driving everyone insane and every little chance of getting rid of it is to be taken seriously. 

When Joel finally gives up, he sighs and jumps on the king sized bed next to Henry, limbs stretching to find even a little piece of cool fabric. 

"Ya know, I was so out of it the other day that I legit though of sleeping in the tub full of cold water"

"Ah yes, so you'd be nice and ready for your funeral when you eventually drown or die of hypothermia" 

"Anything better than this goddamn heat" 

Henry sits up on the bed and removes his shirt, leaving it on the floor. When he turns around he finds Joel looking at him, surprised when he doesn't look away after being caught. His heart skips a bit. He lies back down, sighing, both of them now looking at the ceiling, in comfortable silence. 

"Have you ever thought about the future?" 

"Pretty much all I can think about"

"I don't mean thinking about how to survive until the next day. I mean, you know...what will happen to the world in 50 years"

"Ah. No, not really. I just, went along with it ya know"

"Yeah" 

They are again silent. Joel turns on his side to look at Henry.

"Not until you came along"

Now it's Henry's turn to look at Joel. 

Joel stared at Henry. Henry stared back. They lied on the bed looking at each other for a beat, before Joel slowly nudges forward and closes the gap between them. 

It's soft and quick, something two teens would give each other on their first date. But it's perfect, just like Henry had imagined. Just as quickly as it happened it's over, but Joel doesn't turn around, he doesn't get ashamed of his actions, he just keeps looking at Henry until his eyes start to close. 

"I am even hotter than before now" 

Henry gives a hearty laugh and hits Joel with his pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the love you've been giving the story even during my small hiatus :)   
> Things have been hard IRL but I'm glad to be back ❤️


End file.
